That's frickin awesome!!

I broke my collarbone recently, medically speaking a broken bone is called a fracture still but I saw the x-ray, it's definitely broken. I also fractured my kneecap in the same accident but the collarbone was the painful one. While I was sat at home for just over three weeks I spent a long time thinking about how different the accident could have been; what if I hit the taxi at a different angle? What if the door that opened had opened a fraction of a second later? In amongst all the morbid thoughts was a deeper and more profound thought: THE HUMAN BODY IS FRICKIN AWESOME!!

See, anyone who came to visit me would have seen me sat on my sofa, drinking coffee and watching TV. Outwardly that is exactly what I was doing but on the inside, completely independently of any conscious thought, my body was mending itself. I'm sure there are plenty of people that could explain to me exactly what was going on physiologically but I'm not that interested. I prefer to think that there are lots of little workmen repairing the damage done. Obviously this is not the case but it doesn't matter, the endlessly complex goings on within my right shoulder are fully automated, my body is just getting on with restoring the full physical capability to my arm, hopefully exactly as it was before. To me this is absolutely incredible, and I defy anyone else who actually thinks about it to disagree with me. 

Scientists estimate that 'humans' branched off from chimps in the evolutionary tree approximately 5-7 million years ago, so assuming Mr Darwin and these scientists are correct we, as a species, have had a fair amount of time to get good at this sort of thing. Most of us have distinguished ourselves from chimps quite successfully but there are a few lagging behind.

Too obvious?!

My accident was the kick start I needed to get on and begin writing this blog. I will be writing about all the FRICKIN AWESOME!! things about life on Planet Earth I know or learn about. 

So to begin with: The Magicicada. Already you're thinking this is gonna be good. I know you are! The clue is in the name MAGICicada. I first learned about this amazing little insect in a David Attenborough documentary about 5 years ago, before this I had no great respect for insects but this one changed it all. They're from the northern and eastern states of the USA and they truly blew my mind when I first learned about them. 

There are 7 known species of the Magicicada, 3 of these species have a life cycle of 17 years and the other 4 have a life cycle of 13 years. The interesting thing about them is that all but approximately 1 week of their life cycle is spent underground before emerging to mate. What's even more interesting is that every specimen within the localised population of each species is developmentally synchronised. This means that they all emerge to mate at the same time, one week before the end of their 13 or 17 year life cycle, having spent the other 12 or 16 years and 51 weeks snuggling up together underground in preparation for what must be the biggest orgy in nature. Just think of the anticipation that must have built up in their little insect minds!! Numbers of Magicicadas in an emergence, or Brood, have been recorded in excess of 1.5 million per acre! That's a lot of insect nookie.

The Magicicada on a warm spring evening will crawl out from the ground and sit on nearby vegetation (if it can find space!) until final transformation into adulthood is complete. Once a fully grown adult their EXOSKELETON will harden and the mating can begin.

The suggested reason for the Magicicada's evolutionary path is twofold. The first being a survival technique known as PREDATOR SATIATION. While the Magicicada's exoskeleton is hardening they are easy prey, so the sheer numbers of them will ensure that no predator could ever consume them all, thus ensuring all the insect sex (insex?!) can happen and their species continues to survive. 

The second reason is what tops this insect off for me as one of the most FRICKIN AWESOME!! things I have ever heard about. In an amazing link to other forms of life on the planet; David Attenborough explained to me that the mulch that results from millions upon millions of rotting Magicicadas provided the perfect fertiliser for the surrounding forest's growth. This is the really incredible bit: records show that in the year prior to the Brood's emergance that tree growth in the forest has declined significantly due to the lil buggers in the ground munching on all their roots. So the Magicicadas gorge on the tree roots for a years, killing the trees a little, have a massive week long party then die and in doing so make up for the damage they caused. So in effect the Magicicadas exist to further the growth of the trees, the trees exist to further the capability of the Magicicada to breed. Which begs the age old question: What came first? The Tree or the Magicicada? Elton John called this sort of thing The Circle of Life.

I find it truly amazing that Planet Earth and all it's inhabitants are so inextricably linked in the evolutionary chain, making that scene in Jurassic Park where Jeff Goldblum's character explains to the dozy scientist that it doesn't matter that all the dinosaurs "born" in Jurassic Park are female one of the most profound moments of cinema I have ever witnessed. Thank you Jeff. You and the Magicicadas are truly FRICKIN AWESOME!!


On another note.....

A friend gave me a CD this week. It's a chap called Marcus Bonfanti and I've really been enjoying it. It seems like a nice blend of Seasick Steve, Tom Waits and Chris Rea (remember him?!). I urge you all to check him out here. I've also been listening to a great deal of the fantastic The Idol Rich who have a sure-to-be-bloody-brilliant album coming out soon.